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My thoughts have been interrupted by a phonecall from my sister who has recently settled in Fermanagh. She started "You won't believe what just happened"...

She said was taking a stroll down a rode in Fermanagh just now, rounded a corner to find a 35ish year old man sitting in his car jerking off furiously!

"What the fuck!".

The guy was sitting there weapon-in-hand staring at her. He didn't stop. She thinks he drove past her and positioned himself there waiting for her intentionally.

My sister calmly moved to confront him while calling the cops, then read out his number plate to them. Only at that point did the guy stop and say "Ah, don't do that". He then quickly reversed the car away.

Fucking nutjob!

Fair enough if the guy got caught, was embarrassed and stopped; but this guy just kept on going while staring at her.

My sister and I were laughing about it I can't help thinking that if he has so few inhibitions, what might he eventually brazen to do. Especially has it been a more timid person than my sister who encountered him and had he got away with it.

She said Fermanagh people were a bit strange alright. I'm advising my sis to get some pepper spray... or better yet a stun gun. Next nutjob she meets, she could put 2000 volts through his nads.

Filing this under funny - or maybe I should add the keyword "strange". Hmm.

I think we Irish would do well to start embracing and apply to Ireland a quote from the famous January 20th, 1961 Inaugural speech of John F. Kennedy's.

We are, it seems to me at least, after turning into a country of grumpy tantrum-throwing children begging, nay demanding government handouts and impeccable services.

On the news every night, we see groups threatening strike action, groups demanding better pay, people suing for their rights to better services.

But am I wrong to complain? Is this just the facet of modern Ireland? Is it wrong to expect the highest level of service given our high tax bills and performing economy?

The line of John's speech I am referring to is of course "Ask not what you country can do for you, but what you can do for your country".

Unlike others I couldn't mention (some of you know who I mean), I don't often slate companies and ruin their good name too often but enough is enough. Read my little story...

Wanting to get some different Christmas pressies this year, I splashed out on goodies from www.iwoot.co.uk (I Want One Of Those). I ordered presents for my sister, her boyfriend, the lads and of course my good self. That was on the lets see...the  16th of December and I got an email on the 17th saying the order has been dispatched.

I waited and waited... nada, zilch, zip.

I apologised to my sister for not getting her anything for Christmas (apart from a cheap book).

I send an email on January 3nd to every conceivable address iwoot displayed on their site but received no reply. I tried again and again over the next few days whenever I thought if it.

Finally I called them and a polite lady told me she'd get to the bottom of it.

I received an email telling me that the order was with Parceline and I would be contacted within a few days. I said It wasn't really good enough in my reply - I had missed Christmas - and the lady said she'd send me a gift voucher, which, in fairness I received - GP£10 - not bad, but I would have preferred prompt delivery.

It's now the 22nd of January and guess what... that's right Buddy, no feckin' pressies. I emailed the lady who sent me the voucher and got a reply back from "CS Team" saying they were sorry my voucher had been delayed - wtf? - read the bloody email customer support dude.

Aaaaaa! How hard is it to get something posted from England to Ireland. I don't think I'll be ordering from iwoot.co.uk anytime in the near future.

Update

I took delivery of the Christmas Presents on 22th January. Presents, thought to have been merely a figment of my imagination were promptly delivered.

Ah, I love the smell of a new book.

I just received delivery from Amazon of The Great War for Civilisation - The Conquest of the Middle East by Robert Fisk. A taxi driver insisted I get it. He said it was "just amazing "and went out of his way to write down the name of the book on the back of the taxi receipt for me.

I'll be reading this for the next 2 months (I'm a fairly slow and deliberate reader) and it's a big 'un.

PS.

I didn't think I was into fantasy books until I stumbled across the Raymond E. Feist series - I recommend you give him a blast regardless of your current reading preference - start with Magician.

Aside:

A lot of people I know don't read. It's shocking!
Fact, Fiction, Fantasy, History, Biographies, Insights... whatever rocks your boat - It doesn't matter - I promise you that if you don't read regularly your missing out.

Maybe i'm just drunk. Maybe it's just that I had a good night out, maybe it's the 3 way shift I had with 2 sexual lesbos earlier... maybe it's that I've just watched am awesome movie (Crack) but i'm in a great mood. Goodnight world.